387199_599567303389195_338862309_n (1) suicide prevention my savior

It’s hard to find inspiration and feel good words sometimes.  So tonight I am just going to talk to you about real life. Happening right now. Today! I am going to talk to you from my heart and hope you hear me. Just like my book, Can You Hear Me Now?  I and those like me want to be heard.  Stories like this one I’m going to share remind me of that need to be heard and why.

I recently heard from a very good friend and it was not good news.  The story is not uncommon.  The story is indeed an outrage! I want to share it with you.  I want you to get mad and call your congressman, senator and other person who cares about your votes.

A 15-year-old girl tells her Aunt and Uncle that her Mother and guardian are beating her and selling her to men.  She has bruises.  Old and new.  She doesn’t want to go home. Would you? She is ready to tell anyone who will listen and help her.  This is the oldest problem.  Her Mother and guardian are furious.  A police officer that she tried to tell says “Do you really want to get your Momma into trouble?”  I could scream in anger myself!  Why is it this childs fault her “Momma” is going to be in trouble?  So they send her home.  Or try to.  She won’t go.  She runs off back to the Aunts house.  Why?  If she goes home now they will beat her for telling.  This is a given.  Not they might beat her.  THEY WILL BEAT HER!

Her aunt is calling authorities for help.  She is warned, you could be charged with parental interference, and harboring a runaway.  The local phone numbers she can call for an emergency of this type (child abuse) is only open 8am to 5pm.  They suggest that the child needs to go home.

I was this kid.  No hope of getting out.  Suicide was never far from my thoughts as a way out.  I feared for my life most days.  Though I was a terrible student, school was a haven where I could be happy for a few hours.  A reprieve from my realities at home. I would run away.  Authorities would drag me home without question.  It’s an uncomfortable question isn’t it?  Why are you running?

So many of us work so hard to change the worlds thinking so that children can come forward just like this one did.  She is hitting a wall that protects the very people who are hurting her

WOULD YOU SEND YOUR NIECE HOME?  Lets pretend this is not some young girl you don’t know.  Lets pretend this is some young girl or boy that you love and whom you believe.

There are 319 million people in the United States at last count.  There are approximately (by conservative count) 95 million sexually abused and exploited humans in the United States today.  69 million voted Obama into office in 2008.  We have power to change this.  We have power to not just make new laws but to enforce the ones we have.  There is power in numbers if we can just pull ourselves together and do the common sense thing.  95 million people voting and talking can NOT be ignored.

According to the National Cancer institute  there we 232,670 new cases of breast cancer in 2014.  Every year in the United states there are more than 3 million reports of Child abuse involving over 6 million children.  Breast cancer is considered epidemic and a problem (and it is, I’m not here to bash breast cancer) I’m simply asking you o do the math.

See those pictures?  That’s me standing next to a redwood tree I used to sleep in when I would run away.   See the gruesome cartoon?  That’s me too.  with all the things that went on behind closed doors.  I ran away all the time.  Don’t let kids like this have to run away to escape.

What would you do if this was you the child came to?

What would you do if this was your niece or nephew?

Who will even be sharing this post with a story that is difficult to think about, and harder to ask your friends to think about.


What will we all do if you turn away?

We hold everything within ourselves to change our lives…

Profoundly simple and profoundly difficult.  Is it really just an idle thought on a Sunday night?  No! Not at all!

Consider this thought from Andrew Carnegie:

Any idea that is held in the mind, that is either feared, or revered, will begin at once to clothe itself in the most conveinient and appropriate form available….

Key words are feared and revered.  Why are both words key to us as survivors?  As children we feared and indeed revered our abuser(s)   They shaped our beliefs about ourselves. They controlled our belief of ourselves and to survive we clothed ourselves in the most conveinient and appropriate form available.  We also did it out of innocence.

What do you believe today?

It’s good to be back!  Annie




I hear so often from survivors, and I was once guilty myself, “I am not who I am supposed to be!” Who do you think that was? Whats wrong with who you are now?

I myself was brought up short with that question when I was lamenting to a counselor, “Look at my life! It’s ruined!”

Who were you supposed to be except happy, able to love and be loved and at peace? You have always been that person. You just got a little lost on the trail because of lies and deceit. Get up, get back on the road with your new map and move forward.

Just be yourself, embrace all the parts of yourself. Sit quietly this morning for just a minute and tell yourself, your inner child, “Your abuser is a criminal who lied to you. You are loved and you can be at peace.”